You know the whole: "The days are long, but the years are short" thing?
Painfully so, at times.
I can personally attest to the "days are long" part. They are indeed so very long.
And the "years are short" business? Well, I'm just getting a glimpse of that, but again....yes. Oh my, yes.
I get caught up in the first part though. Feeling the weight of the present, and longing for the future. I forget that we'll be there before I know it, and all my speedy wishing will be replaced by wistful nostalgia.
So I'm trying to remember.
Remember that every 20 minutes spent sitting on the ground nursing, every ounce of sweat shed while chasing after a toddler while strapped to a newborn, every trek up the stairs lugging a stroller and a carseat, every can of Coke used to combat the overwhelming exhaustion...
...every long day...
is part of some very short years I get to spend with my girls.
I'm not great at it. But I'm trying. Trying to love them right now. Through the yawns, and the tantrums, and the sweat, and the tears. Trying to be with them. Be wholly present in these fleeting moments.
Dear Present Courtney,
You wanted this.
You prayed for this.
You don't deserve this.
You will make it through this.
You will miss this.
Love, Future Courtney