Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Costume Week: School Days

You've already seen my baby pics, and my college costumes...now it's time to fill in the gap with some elementary school memories.

Kindergarten: Black cat

Allegedly it's a cat anyway...It could be a dog. Or a bunny. Or any type of rodent. But my mom assures me it's a cat. Perhaps she's never seen real cat ears?

The lion next to me is Leo. He stood on my grandparents' neighbors' porch for years when I was a kid. My mom would take me over there every year to take a picture and mark my growth. And harass their neighbors, I assume.

I'm pretty sure my grandpa is just dressed as my grandpa. It was a little hard to be sure with him sometimes. But we'll wait for my mom to chime-in in the comments to be sure....

1st Grade: Minnie Mouse

There is a pretty clear dividing line here, from baby animal costumes, to mature, girl-about-town Disney selections. Well, that's how I remember it anyway. This is the first year I got to pick my own costume, and coincidentally (or not) the first non-handmade year as well. I really wanted to be Minnie, so my mom talked to a friend about borrowing her daughter's costume. I should have been grateful for the loan, but instead I remember being really upset that the dress had a picture of Minnie on it. The real Minnie Mouse doesn't wear a dress with her own face on it? What kind of impostor crap was this get-up? I was a mouse purist after all. If I'm going to go the extra mile and paint on a widow's peak, I'm going to expect the same level of effort from the wardrobe department.

My cousin Geoffrey is Splinter (in his real Tae Kwan Do outfit!)
How 90's-awesome is that?! Bonus points for the unibrow.

2nd Grade: Cleopatra

This is a phenomenon known as lamazing: An event in which something is so horrifically lame, that it somehow morphs into amazing.

Should we take it from the top? With the cheap wig barely even trying to cover my monstrous pasty forehead? Or from the bottom: where I might actually be wearing tights over my children's orthopedic sandals? The costume was my mom's actually, and I think I was jealous of how glamourous and worldly she looked and begged to wear it. Hmmmm...guess it didn't quite translate on a seven year old.

3rd Grade: Cinderella

Another Disney moment...This one thankfully devoid of an embroidery rendering of the character in question. Only thing that threatens to ruin my princess perfection (besides some dance recital level makeup) is my ace-bandaged wrapped sprained wrist.

Maybe I hurt myself stumbling around in the dark after my mom kept making me take off glasses for pictures?

4th Grade: 50's girl

This one was my go-to. I swear I wore it more than one year, and if not, I know it was at least repurposed from my birthday party the year before. (Yes, I had costume birthdays back then too...No surpise I'm sure.)

I'm pretty sure I had arms, but in my mom's turtleneck and cardigan, it's hard to say for sure.
The one thing I do know is that my dad's high-tops are cooler than I'll ever be.

What I really should have found was a photo of my cat in a matching skirt. 
Because that was most definitely a thing.

With my BFF's the Peters girls. Have you ever seen a sweeter set of little ladies? 
Nothing like these pussy-call-doll-cheetah-girl-hootchie-mamas I see parading around these days. Whatever happened to a nice prairie bonnet and clean white twinset?

5th Grade: Cow

Meredith Peters was the twin sister I never had and from first grade on, we did everything together: trick or treating, glasses-shopping...you name it. So if she was going to be a chef, I was going to be a cow. I'd lay down my costume-clad life for that girl.

Rockin' earrings she has, no? 

Well....it's almost the big day...Hopefully I inspired you to bright your costume A-game. And if not, call my mom. She probably has a wig you can borrow.


  1. This was hilarious - Between the pictures and your jokes...Your subtly (sp?) cracks me up. Also, let me tell you a few things I mis-read that brightened this experience even more...
    1. When you started talking about the lion next to you, I thought you were referring to the man in the picture below that caption. I spent a couple secs trying to figure out why he was a lion and also, why he spent so much time sitting on your neighbor's porch.
    2. 'lamazing' - I thought this was a reference to some pre-birthing class. I had no idea what I was going to see when I scrolled down.

    1. I love that we get each other, because your comment killed me.

      1: Yes, by grandfather was actually a Great Cat, and spent a ton of time lounging at the neighbors. You know, while my grandma was out hunting for the rest of the pride.
      2: never even crossed my mind. Perhaps I should leave the fake word contractions to the geniuses at US weekly that brought us Brangelina.