Today marks the second anniversary of moving into our house. I suppose I could have to baked a cake, or bought something special, but instead we just trekked out in the rain-soaked grass for a (not-so) quick family selfie to mark the occasion.
(nailed it. As always.)
In so many ways this house is nothing special...but in total it's actually something incredible.
It's more than a crowded garage, a messy basement, and chipping baseboards (though it is most definitely all of that). But it's also more than a picture-perfect view, spacious rooms and what seems like (comparatively speaking) an obscene number of bathrooms.
In all the good, and the bad, and the just plain ordinary, this house is our safe haven, a spot for our family to grow, play, laugh, and rest. It's an imperfect and lovely backdrop for our imperfect and lovely lives.
I know we may not always live here, but I also know that wherever we may go next, we will always look back on this as the place we were when…
...When Fin turned one and we had a giant party on the deck...When we all got the stomach flu at the same time, and lived to tell about it...When Dustin took a risk and decided to be a stay-at-home dad (temporarily anyway)...When Miller was born and we brought him home.
It's only been two years, but this house has already seen a thousand PBS kids shows, a million tears, a and about a jillion macaroni noodles. I can't imagine what the next year holds for us, but no matter what, I couldn't be more thankful for this place, these people, or this house.
Happy anniversary, you beautiful chunk of home, you!
Oh- and just for giggles...I thought I'd share the video version of this morning's celebration. (Further) proof we should never be vloggers.
When trying to making magic moments with three kids, I've learned you just have to take what you can get...case in point: matching Halloween costumes. Adorable in theory, slightly difficult to execute, and nearly possible to capture.
No really...this was the best I could do.
But no one lost an eye, so by Three Kid Standards, that's a win.
He's right not to trust us.
I was actually downright thrilled we even got them all in the outfits at all. Piper was all for it (she takes after me in that way), but Fin has been costume resistant as of late, so I didn't know what to expect. I think she liked the idea of matching though, so she was happy to get her new shirt on...just less enthusiastic about sitting still for longer than a millisecond. Miller managed to not throw up on his shirt, which was a small miracle. So while it wasn't going perfectly, it was certainly a lot better than it could be, so I couldn't complain.
I tried for a few more shots once we got outside, but the girls discovered they could wear their buckets like hats....so it was pretty much over before it started.
Piper kept screaming, "I'm a robot" and Fin was just a constant fit of giggles.
Miller had his own hat, but a decidedly less jovial attitude:
So once we had (not at all) successfully immortalized our ensembles on film, we headed out to the event of the evening: the "Midnight Madness" trick-or-treat through our town's business district (now an annual tradition for us after we had so much fun last year). The weather was perfection so even the photo-fails couldn't dampen our enthusiasm. (Ok...more accurately: I was pumped, Dustin tolerated the outing, Piper was excited to get candy, and Fin had to be put in time out in the yard before we even left because she was throwing such a fit about getting in the car. Miller cried too, but there was really nothing in it for him, so I can't blame him.) But by the time we made it there (10 minutes down the street) everyone was happy (or asleep) and we were ready to get our spooky groove on.
Each store was open extra late (though we got there right when it started, to avoid bedtime drama), store windows were decked out for a best display contest, and shopkeepers were handing out treats. We walked around for a little less than an hour, checking out the displays, and loading up on candy. Fin was still a little wary of the process, but she held my hand the entire time, and even managed to squeak out a timid "Twick Tweet" at about half the stores. (We had practiced a little just before we left, but it was still a little confusing for her. When we approached the first stop, I prompted her- "What do you say, Fin?", resulting in her saying "Thank you!" before she even got candy. I corrected, "No, I mean what do you say if you want a piece of candy?" To which she logically followed, "I have candy, please?" Well...close enough). Piper was an expert though, ending up with quite the haul...she wanted to eat each piece immediately, so we had to make a few compromises, but overall she did awesome and was incredibly polite.
They both got a kick out of seeing all the other kids' costumes, and even a few dressed up dogs as well. The caramel apple lollipops were the hit of the evening, and we all agreed on our favorite store display:
On our way out we ran into my nephew, dressed as some sort of adorable hobo/skeleton hand/farmer:
And Miller woke up just in time to serenade us out with some light screaming. How appropriate for the holiday.
All in all, it was a great practice for them for the official trick or treat night through the neighborhood, and good practice for me for keeping my expectations low when it comes to perfect family snapshots.... At this stage I'm becoming more and more appreciative of simple events like this. Nothing too crazy, just a few cute sweatshirts, some awesome weather, and a nice candy filled walk around town. We didn't end up with a flawless photo, but we couldn't have had a better time.
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You know one of the best parts of having kids? You can brainwash them into loving the same things you love!
Ok...kidding. My kids actually came hard wired with some pretty strong preferences when it comes to most things. They know what toys they want to play with, what colors they like, and what clothes they want to wear. Conversely, they know what they don't like, and no amount of me begging/using logic can change their minds.
But there are other things that they're totally open to, giving me the opportunity to help them shape their preferences (aka: make my loves, their loves). When it comes to things like states, or schools, or sports teams, they barely understand what they are, let alone having an opinion on which ones are the best. (It took us at least three years for Piper to grasp that we lived in Pennsylvania...just long enough for us to move!) So their future fan-dom is pretty much based on what we teach them.
Honestly, that's something that has made me laugh/freaked me out since becoming a parent: It's relatively easy to push your allegiances on your kids. I never thought about it much before, I just took my preferences at face value, not realizing how I came to them, or how deeply ingrained they are. I grew up in Columbus Ohio, so I was raised that (the) OSU is the best- fact, not opinion. Michigan (the school, the state, and really anything remotely mitten shaped), along with anyone who likes it, are the worst. Fact. Now that I've lived in different cites and states, I've realized a couple things:
People in Columbus are crazy-passionate fans.
Most places have similar non-negotiable Things You Must Love to some level or another
Pittsburgh is a land of proud yinzers who live and die by their Pens, Buccos, and beloved Stillers. Attending the University of Cincinnati taught me (among other, more useful things) what a Bearcat is, and how to proudly recite every word to our alma mater and fight songs. And you're all well aware that Dustin bleeds midnight green (the official color of the Philadelphia Eagles, duh).
A photo posted by Courtney Bowden (@bowdenisms) on
Basically...people are raised to love what their parents love. Typically it comes from a "root for the home team" sentiment based on where you grow up, but I've often met fans of far flung teams or schools, just because it's what their mom or dad loved. The more I've thought about it, the more it's actually scared me a little. I don't want to make a crazy leap (or be a total downer), but having a little hindsight on being raised in an environment that held such strong opinions on us vs. them, gives me a least a clue about how it's possible for kids to be taught much worse things (racism, sexism, cult religion, political fanaticism...) without realizing it's wrong. Thankfully, being...say...a Cowboys fan isn't the worst thing that can happen to someone (unless you ask Dustin- who believes that's a fate worse than death), but what about when it's more than just which football team you watch on Sundays? I can unfortunately see how prejudices could be handed down, and kids can be indoctrinated into certain views without them ever realizing they had a choice to think or value something different. After all, to this day it's hard for me to wear yellow and blue together, so silly or not, things like this run pretty deep.
We joke about "future buckeyes" and "raising them right!" (though I draw the line at owning a decal of Calvin peeing on anything...) but honestly, the job of shaping a human a huge big responsibility. Yes, their eventual sports allegiances are relatively harmless (unless they end up Browns fans...that's just guaranteeing a lifetime of heartache) but it's a good example and reminder that my kids are impressionable little things, and their watching and learning from everything we do. I pray they grow up to value the faith we follow, but I don't want to force it on them. And I'd love to share common interests and passions with them, but I'd much rather them find things they authentically love (bonus points if it's something I enjoy!) Hopefully we'll be able to expose them to a wide variety of experiences and perspectives, helping them shape their own views.
But don't kid yourself...we're still going to push scarlet and grey on them (and teach them the value of black and gold, Bearcat power, and make sure they know how to spell E-A-G-L-E-S, EAGLES!), but I promise to use my power of persuasion like I use my new selfie stick...only for good.
(I said use it for good...not that we're actually good at using it...)
(yes, that's a baby dressed as a football, and for that I make NO apologies...)
See? He loves it. Because I told him so.
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A photo posted by Courtney Bowden (@bowdenisms) on
It's hard to believe it's been a year- in that weird "seems like it's been a day, and seems like it's been a lifetime" way. Is that how everything is when you're an adult? Time goes so incredibly fast, so I blink and we hit milestones that don't seem possible.
One year is also a bit of a strange marker with a house...because in one sense, it's a ton of time to settle in, and on the other hand, I still feel like we just got here, so of course we still have moving boxes I haven't sifted through. That's perfectly reasonable, right? I'm not sure I had a goal for what our house would look like one year in...Maybe more organized (ok...definitely more organized) and maybe more tailored to our taste...But decorating and renovating is a slow process (at least it is when you're also trying to keep up with a never ending stream of regular life tasks). I was actually going to shoot another video tour as a 12 month update, but the place was such a hot hot mess, that it passed #showyourreal territory, into #showyou'regross. It's not actually dirty, per se, but we (constantly) have about seven projects in the works, so every room has some pile/stash/obstacle/safety hazard that we're "working on". We're making some big updates (new shared bedroom for the girls!) and some small ones (hanging pictures...still...forever...) so I'm hoping to share those soon. Mostly because I'm hoping to be done with them soon. (Side note- I wish I could transfer the sense of crazy urgency that pregnancy nesting provides, onto someone who's not pregnant, therefore has the energy/physical ability to actually get all these goals done. Dustin humors me, and works harder than anyone should really ever be expected to, but that doesn't mean he fully understands why we need a new laundry room door RIGHT NOW, whereas that mandate seems perfectly logical to me.)
So I could easily go on and on about all the things I want to do/fix/change, but there will always be those things. The point is, we've been here for a year. We've had a wild, wonderful, FULL year together in our home, and it is so much more than I could have ever imagined. So I thought it would be fun to highlight just a few of the nearly infinite reasons I just adore this house...
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Our deck and backyard which has allowed us to host playdates, cookouts, bouncehouse parties, late night card games, first birthday parties...If a more perfect backyard exists...I've never seen it.
Seriously...I even like it in the winter...which is saying something.
Ok. One more. But c'mon...
The spot in front of the piano which has become our default "stand here and take a picture to commemorate this semi-milestone" location. I think it's because it gets good light, allows me to get far enough away to capture their (non)poses, and it's not usually as messy as the rest of the house. But regardless, I just love thinking about how many pictures we'll have in this spot over the years as the kids grow.
First day of "school" // Snow Day // Easter
Our bedroom which is unnecessarily huge, and always the last priority on the to-do list. But the big windows let in the sunrise so it's the perfect spot for early morning family hangouts when two little girls come bounding in at dawn.
The "master" bathtub that I've never set foot in, but has been home to weekly (at least...semi-weekly if we're really on the ball) water parties for two.
My kitchen- the giant table, the bay windows, the layout that allows me to work and prep while keeping an eye on two little munchkins, sharing secrets and laughs. I love how many new friends we've already gotten to have gather around this table, and I'm hopeful for many new faces to join us...
The breakfast bar, where some of us clean up old messes, while the others make new ones. Every day starts here, and even if just for a few minutes during the crazy rush, we're all together...and covered in syrup.
Our monstrous sectional (1/8 pictured here). We watch, we read, we fight over our favorite spot (well, some of us do), we fall asleep watching reality TV (well, one of us does). It's big, and cozy, and awesome.
Ok...cheating: the backyard again. And more specifically, the swingset the neighbors gave us. When we toured this house, I knew I wanted it the minute I stepped into the kitchen, and imagined the view I'd have while washing dishes. Not a glamorous thought, maybe, but I stood there, and just knew that this could and should be our house. I pictured looking out those windows, and seeing our kids running, and playing; free to have fun, but still safely in my line of sight. This year Fin is old enough to navigate the three deck steps to the yard solo, and Piper has even mastered opening/closing the screendoor without mashing anyone's fingers, so they're pretty much free-range chicks. (Though we still bail on the dishes to play with them instead).
Our neighborhood. But mostly: our neighbors. We hit the jackpot with these people, truly. We're surrounded on all sides by fun, friendly, families, who we hang out with regularly, borrow things from without shame, and just adore sharing little day-to-day moments with. The suburbs really are a special kind of life, and these people are a huge part of why.
I could go on and on...There are a zillion more teeny (and not so teeny) things I'm thankful for around this house, even if I don't have the words or photos to capture it. A house is just a house, but this house has already been the frame around so many of our moments as a family. I am beyond thankful for the memories and blessings we've experienced in it this year.
House update time! Because somehow, we haven't done a tour since June!
I realized when visiting family in Philly, that I haven't done a great job of filling people in on our house. Sure, we've done the video walk throughs, but I haven't really written about our place much, which is a shame because WE ARE IN LOVE. So to give you the details, but spare you a novel, I'll give you a list of highlights:
It's 10 minutes from my mom (and 8 from my brother, and 6 from my sister and 20 from my dad and 12 from our new church). There are no real words for how awesome that is.
It's gloriously suburban. That means it doesn't come with much character-it looks almost identical to its 157 beige neighbors- but it does come with...(list within a list time!!):
drywall (vs. plaster)
more than one bathroom
sidewalks
a flat back yard (that's practically fenced in)
an attached garage
no "must do" projects
Gorgeous Ohio landscape. I know, I know, not everyone appreciates the glory of the Midwestern plains ...But our property backs up to a little nature preserve field, so it's all the beauty of having a few acres, with none of the work to take care of it. And I swear to you we've
had a photo-worthy sunset every night this month (Dustin rolls his eyes as I carry the kids around the house- literally walking in a loop around the exterior of our house- looking for all the different colors we can spot.)
It comes with amazing neighbors. Kids, dogs, playmates, Powerwheels, homemade pumpkin bread, after-work beers...This place has it all. I'm loving getting to know everyone, and forming a little village where we look after each other.
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This may not look like much, but this: is my village. And when I come around the bend after a far too long day at work, and I see my family and neighbors, and home (and a sunset!), my heart is full. So thankful for this village. #houseofbowden
So that's some of the behind-the-scenes emotion of it all...But what about the behind-the-blog decor updates of it all? For that- we have video!
I have to tell you, that when we shot this video a couple weeks ago, I was positive we had already done an updated video tour of the house without boxes. Well...I was totally wrong. Turns out the last one we posted basically looked like the inside of a storage locker (plus some beds). So as a result, this video is pretty much an endless stream of me mistakenly saying "we haven't really done anything here" or "that's not really new", when in reality, compared to the state of things in June, we've actually done a lot. No, we haven't painted anything, or done anything that can actually be considered a home improvement project. But we sure have unpacked a lot....and strewn it about the house to create a thoroughly "lived-in" look. So.....there's that.
But truly- my goal in these videos isn't to wow you. (I mean...thank goodness...or I would be fail-ING.) It's just to capture the everyday-ness of our everyday. I intentionally didn't clean up before shooting mostly because I hate cleaning up, but also because I want to show it how it really is...a bit chaotic, a bit unfinished, a BIG bit messy, but still- home. And to that point, this is the first video in the new house where we have our kids running around in the background. Turns out they're also a bit chaotic, a bit messy- and a BIG bit loud (and only semi-clothed). So: real.
And along those lines- as a final caveat before we get to the fun stuff- do people ever watch themselves on video and say, "MAN. I look awesome. My mannerisms are in no way annoying, my voice sounds adorable, and all the additional angles I don't typically witness really just enhance my already sky-high self-image!"?I would like to meet these people. And punch them in their perfect teeth.
So with that....I give you the latest tour of The Bowden Home:
Thought it would be fun to share another video from our move. Quick (ok, 5 minute) fly throughs of the house are proving to be the easiest way to capture the full scope of the crazy, and the fastest way to share it out. I've taken pictures along the way, but they don't seem to do it justice, and nothing beats the simplicity of an iPhone video uploaded via wireless.
You can tell from the title- we're all moved in! Well.....sort of. We got our stuff in the house at least. And some of it's even in the right rooms! This video is from Friday of Memorial day weekend, so it was about 5 days after the movers left, but we had yet to actually stay at the house (for reasons that will be obvious.) I've moved a million times (ok...maybe a dozen) over the years, but this is our first full-fledged house-to-house move, across state lines, with all the trappings of a family of four (where at least two of those four are certified hoarders.)
And on that note, I just have to say...if you have ever moved, and I didn't show up, bring beer, unpack boxes, watch your children, adopt your dog, and order in dinner, then I sincerely apologize. Moving is No Joke. For me, it definitely falls into the "Things I Never Want to Do Again" category. I wonder if it's like childbirth, and after it's all over you forget the pain? Hard to say, but I can assure you I will not be ready to do this again in 19 months.
I was on my own for this tour, so (un)fortunately you don't get to see me with a dirty ponytail, squinting at the camera while I ramble. I also forgot to tour the basement (again), but I do give at least 30 seconds of puffer vest fodder, so we'll call it even.
We've made a ton of progress since then. But it's meant working for a couple hours every night after the kids go to bed, and relying on family to watch them for a few weekend hours to give us some uninterrupted time. So it hasn't been easy. Or quick. Or overwhelmingly fun. But we're getting somewhere (meaning I can see- most of- the floor, and have yet to loose a child in any of our temporary trash heaps.) We'll take that as a win, and keep plugging away.
Yay! After a couple months of waiting, we finally got to move into our new home!
And that's good news for you...well, it is if you were itching for another long-winded Bowdenisms video, anyway. Anyone?
We moved in yesterday, which has solidified several things:
We have entirely too much stuff.
I mean like, way too much stuff.
It's mostly my fault.
We are never going to move again.
The movers arrived at 10 AM, and left around 8:30 PM. It was a gigantic undertaking either way, but if we hadn't had movers we never would've been done. Mostly because I would still be curled up in the fetal position somewhere on I-70 repeating, "I don't wanna, I don't wanna."
The good news is, we actually technically planned on moving in next weekend, even though we got possession on Sundy...I think we it was going to be impossible. So all of our stuff is in the house, but we will use the next week, going over in the evenings after the kids are asleep, to finish up. And by finish, I have no idea what I mean, because there's no way it will ever be finished, ever. I will die in a mountain of my own hoarding, I'm sure of it.
Kidding aside, it actually went pretty smoothly, if slowly. My mom watched the girls all day so we could get things done without losing a baby in a box somewhere, and my dad came over to help unpack the kitchen, which really just means listen to Courtney get all bossy-pants about where things should go, and then re-do it three times when things don't fit. I think he had a blast.
After about 12 hours of working, everything is in the house- a few rooms are about a quarter of the way put together, but the most important thing is our patio is one hundred percent ready to roll. Priorities. I'm hoping to get some progress shots tonight, (only if I can scoot over there in time to be back for The Bachelorette. Again, priorities.) but for now I love to give you a tour of the empty shell- aka, before the madness happened.
As with all Bowden house videos, this one has a signature phrase, but we've upgraded this time around, so we actually are giving you two: the standard "We're really excited!", but also a new one, "We've never had one of those before!" The last three places we've lived have been a minimum of 50 years old, with most leaning closer to the hundred year mark, so moving into a house that was built into 2002 is filled with all kinds of modern conveniences I can barely wrap my head around. Like an attached garage, and a basement without a horror movie quality toilet in the corner. (that one's for you, Pittsburgh). We're pretty lucky because every time we move, we seem to add a bedroom, and gain another feature we previously didn't have. From our first apartment to our second, we got a second bedroom and a real dining room, then when we moved into our house we were probably most excited about a dishwasher. We're definitely going to miss the character and craftsmanship of our 1920 home, but there's something to be said for the convenience of suburban living, with its flat backyard, drywall construction, and 2.5 bathrooms. (I have a master bath, with a separate tiny room for a toilet. What am I, a queen?!)
Oh, and a note on quality- I know you've come to expect a pretty solid level of production from these videos (heavy, heavy sarcasm) so this one should not disappoint. It was shot entirely on Dustin's phone, edited on an iPhone app, posted to Vimeo, and then I blogged it on my phone using voice to text. The future of blogging is now.
Hello present? It's the future. I'm here.
Knock knock
Who's there?
The future.
The future who?
Too late, it already happened.
Okay, I'll stop before I actually cause the demise of blogging.
Now, settle in for 15+ minutes of grainy footage, marital spats, and a glimpse behind the curtain (literally...the sellers left some curtains...) into our new home. We're so excited.
Now, this is a story all about how my life got flipped-turned upside down. And I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there…
Ok, wait….that’s a theme song, not a blog post.
But the sentiment applies. Life is a bit topsy-turvy lately, since we packed up everything (well, we actually packed up almost nothing…just our clothes and some essentials) and moved to Ohio. Dustin is still in Pitt (you have one last chance to hang out and no last chances to rob our house.) and the girls and I are getting settled into Columbus. Well, as settled as you can get when you’re semi-permanent squatters in someone else’s basement. We move into our new house in less than two weeks, but until then, we’ve been in a bit of limbo, trying to wade through the massive transition that goes with moving, staring a new job, adjusting to a different daycare, and a multitude of other smaller changes. It’s been awesome to be surrounded with family, but we’ve had our share of challenges as well, as we all struggle to adjust to an entirely new life.
It’s a funky in-between time, halfway between the life we left and the life we’re headed for, and though I haven’t documented it much, I thought it would be fun to record some snippets of what we’re up to these days. (From my point of view anyway…)
Making: trips to see friends' biggest milestones- weddings and babies oh my! Cooking: nothing. Soaking up one of the perks of moving back in with my parents. Drinking: these crazy fizzy waters. The grapefruit reminds me of Jamaica. Reading: audio books from the library. Making my commute (and the occasional drive to/from Pittsburgh) productive! (Recent “reads”: Seriously I’m Kidding, David & Goliath, I Feel Bad About My Neck and (don’t judge me) Let Me Tell You Something) Wanting: more patience. Or a more obedient daughter. But mostly more patience.
Looking: for friends in Columbus. Call me. Playing: a steady amount of Candy Crush. It might be the thing I miss most when I wean Fin. Wasting: precious sleep time, staying up to read Divergent. Wishing: colds were like the chicken pox, so you only had to get them once. Enjoying: a coke zero with “soft ice” every day at 3. I’m wild, I know.
Waiting: for the new season of The Bachelorette. (There’s still time to join the pool!) Liking: trolling Craigslist for furniture deals. Wondering: how our lives will change in the next few months. New routines, new church, new friends, new hangouts, new patterns….? Loving: watching sisters and cousins giggle, chase, fight, and play together.
Hoping: we can pack the summer with visits from friends and family (and drinks on the deck). Marveling: at Fin’s chubby thighs. They’re almost too good. Needing: my husband. Smelling: the old food/dishwasher smell in the office stairway, which reminds me of Work Crew, which reminds me of Jesus. Not a good smell, but a good reminder every morning.
Wearing:my same old clothes, hoping copious amounts of jewelry push me into “slightly professional” territory. Following: almost 500 people on Instagram. It’s a little out of control. Noticing: how different, and the same, my home town is. Knowing: we’re making the right choice, even when it’s hard.
Thinking: about what our family will look like in five years. Or ten. Or twenty… Bookmarking: decorating ideas for the new house. Opening: up to new people. Giggling: less than I should.
Feeling: grateful. And exhausted. And excited. And a little sick. And…all the things…
(This was as much of a view as I could snap without looking like a tourist
in my own cube. As you'll see...I have a rep to maintain. Play it cool...)
Highlights from my first week:
Falling up the central staircase in view of the café and reception area (maybe only 4 people saw, but I’m sure that was the first of many literal missteps in my future.)
Spilling mayonnaise on my blouse two hours in to my first day (yes, blouse. I went all out for my “introductory outfit”).
Bringing empty soda cans and vitamin water bottles with me on my way out, planning on throwing them in a recycle bin before the door. There wasn’t one. So I had to stuff it all in my bag like a eco-conscious magpie.
Forgetting where I put my lunch leftovers, causing me to have to search the 'fridge on each floor. Maybe multiple times.
Attempting to return to my desk after lunch, not realizing I was on the wrong floor. I chose to stop at the restroom just to make it look like I had a purpose in walking down a random hallway.
Giving the window washer a show when using the mother’s room. (windows: nice bonus normally, but maybe not so practical in the “lactation lounge”).
It’s actually going awesome. I work with incredibly smart, incredibly nice people, in an incredibly cool environment, on incredibly inspiring projects. (Or I will. Once I finish some training and they actually risk allowing me to do some work. Assuming my stained clothes, and propensity for accidental flashings haven't scared them off...)
People around here tend to use the phrase "super pumped" a lot, and I'm beginning to understand why....
Not too shabby, eh?
(P.s. As always, Dustin has been beyond supportive as I’ve gotten settled. He’s still the best dad I’ve ever seen, COSI/diaper incidents non-withstanding).
It's been awfully quiet around these parts recently. I don't suspect anyone has been loitering around begging for updates, but when I don't write much, my brain starts to get crowded. I haven't avoided posting because I lacked things to say. I've actually haven't written because I had too many things to share. Things that weren't ready to be shared.
But now, the cat is out of the bag, and some of the biggest news in our recent lives is out in the open.
Yep. We're moving.
After seven years in Pittsburgh, it's time to pack up, and head west, for the sunny skies of Columbus. I got a new job, we sold our house, we bought another house…Basically everything we've known has been flipped upside down in a matter of weeks. There is still a tremendous amount of logistics to work out (most pressing: Dustin's job, and childcare for the girls) but God has been paving the way for this move in a way that we can't ignore, so we're trusting that He's not down working out the details for us. It's been an absolutely crazy ride to see how fast life can transform, and as sad as we are to leave this place, we're also thrilled for the next adventure. We've got a little less than two more weeks here, so we're packing in the fun (you know, when we're not literally packing our stuff) and trying to wrap our brains around the monumental changes that are about to take place. Things are on warp speed, but I'm trying as much as I can to soak up every last bit of this sweet season. It's all a bit of a frantic blur as we try to sort and connect the pieces of this life-puzzle, so I won't share the nitty gritty details for now, but know that we are beyond thankful for the experiences we've had and the friends we've made in Pittsburgh.
I'm sure there will be plenty of nostalgia and sweet, sappy musings to come, but for now I thought it would be cool to share a snippet from the process that I jotted down along the way.
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Originally written 2/11/14:
It's happening.
That thing that happens every couple years. Where Dustin I decided maybe, just maybe, it's time to uproot everything and head for the hills. Except not really hills. More like the flatlands of Columbus.
We've been here before, a couple times probably, some times more serious than others. It's always been the eventual goal to move to Columbus I suppose, but that itch has struck again, and we find ourselves seriously exploring the possibility of making a move sooner than later. Sooner like real soon. I'm looking into a job with a retail company there and while I'm at it I'm trying to check out a couple of marketing agencies as well. After a few phone calls and email chains, it's escalated to the point that I actually have an all day in person interview next week. It's far from a done deal, so I don't want to count my chickens before they hatch, but at the same time I feel that I have to process the possibilities now, in order to be prepared when and if a job comes to fruition.
So I can't take it for granted that I'm going to get this job, and further, that I would want to accept this job if so. But I almost have to pretend like that's happening, just in case it does. So I'm trying not to waste any time dwelling on the fear, the worry and the negative, because it's all too soon for any of that to matter. But I am trying to weigh the pros and cons, and allow myself to sit with a very real possibility that our time in Pittsburgh could be coming to a close. When we moved here I signed a two-year contract. I definitely thought we would stay longer than that, but it was at least a minimum. A starting point. That milestone came and went though and Dustin and I kept renewing our original "five-year plan" (the length of time I figured we would be in Pittsburgh before thinking about starting a family and moving back home.) But somehow that plan kept getting extended, and now this Summer will mark seven years (and two babies) in the Steel City.
So when we moved here, I knew I was committing to this town, at least for a while, but I didn't know that I would fall in love. Sure, there are things about Pittsburgh that I can confidently say are The Worst. I don't love having a bridge and/or (mostly and) tunnel between me and anything I want to get to. I don't love that fact that the gray days outnumber the sunny ones. But if I was truly going to hate on Pittsburgh, I would have to get kind of picky. It really is an awesome place. We've met some of the best friends of our lives here, and after seven years, I can confidently say that it is home.
And then there's my job. There have been ups and downs; days where I had to pinch myself to believe that this dream job wasn't all truly just a dream. And then there've been days when I've been overwhelmed, frustrated, and dejected. But again, after seven years, this company is as much my home as this city is. It's all I've known here, and further- all I've really known in the working world. I had five internships before I graduated, in three different cities. I got to try out big city living, small-town living, and squatting in my parents basement. I got to test the waters of design, production, kids clothes, uniforms.... But as far as real-deal, big-girl grown-up job? This is it. This is where I learned pretty much everything. It's now my benchmark by which all other opportunities are measured.
So I now have one foot in both worlds. For as much as I'm prepping mentally to leave, life keeps on going here as if were staying forever. Nothing is a sure thing, so I have to lay the groundwork for what possibilities could be, and at the same time keep our reality in motion. So that means on Wednesday afternoon I have a phone interview with the new company, and Thursday morning I have to remember to call to make future appointments for Piper. It means that I spend evenings working on my resume, and Saturday mornings checking out dance classes for my toddler. We have an exit strategy, and a museum membership. We could be here three more years, or three more weeks. And what all that adds up to, is a serious lack of sleep on my end. (Like I needed that!) I find myself laying awake at night, running over all the possibilities in my mind. Asking myself question after question, to try to make sense of the enormous change that could be coming our way. I can make a list from here that would stretch from here to Ohio, with reasons I want to stay put. I really do love it here. The people alone could convince me to be a Yinzer for life. But then it's not hard to come up with a list equally long of reasons we should go. More specifically- why we should go now. And at the top of that list are two little girls who would benefit greatly from the supportive network of family. Okay, if we're being honest, at the top of that list is one little girl: me, who would benefit greatly from the supportive network of family. No one wants to live with regrets, and I would hate to feel that we left a good thing, or bailed to soon. But at the same time, these years with little ones are fleeting, and the opportunity to spend them alongside family is maybe too great to resist.
So for now, I'll probably keep saying up too late looking at real estate in the suburbs, and checking out LinkedIn for new possibilities, but also keep my nose to the grindstone and stay invested in my current world.
And if after next Tuesday, we do have the option to trade it all in for Part Two of our dream life, then will have a big decision to make. The only thing I know for sure is that God is preparing our path, the same way he has for the last seven years. I just can't wait to see where it leads next.
The girls are still little, so we haven't exactly landed on a "Christmas gift strategy" yet. In general I want to keep the gifts to a relative minimum so that the greed and materialism of the season doesn't take over. But- I love those two little munchkins, and good intentions aside, it's almost impossible to resist spoiling them. So we tried to rein it in, and even encouraged others to limit their spending (and focus on practical things if they couldn't help themselves) but somehow both Piper and Fin ended up with mountains of toys and treats. And for all my worry about turning them into gift grubbers, it was so so fun to watch them get into the spirit of giving (and receiving). There's pretty much nothing sweeter than a baby learning about wrapping paper (how does it feel? How does it sound? How does it taste?!) And there may not be a more enthusiastic gift recipient than a two year old (stickers!!!! A book!!!!!! CHAPSTICK!!!!!!!!!!!)
Both of my girls are incredibly blessed, and my heart is full watching their eyes light up over such (relatively) simple pleasures. In the coming years, Dustin and I will have to discuss our thoughts on Santa, spending limits, and how to keep things fair ("poor" Fin didn't get nearly the haul that her big sister did, but since she's got such a grateful spirit- and terrible counting skills- she was fine with it). But for we tried to pick a few things for their "wishlist" and it worked out perfectly.
I know when we look back on our Christmases, we won't remember, or care, much about what was under the tree, but the gifts the girls got tell a little story about what they're into at this stage of their lives...and it's a fun little snapshot in time for me to record.
Here's Piper's haul:
Backpack- She is obsessed. She would spend hours zipping and unzipping it, hiding her treasures, and weaseling her chubby arms into the straps. And because she can tote her own lunch into "school" it's a win-win for us too.
Doctor kit- I wasn't totally sure if she would get this yet, but she totally loves giving us "check ups", always finishing with a hopeful, "feel better?!"
Apron, oven mitts and chef hat- Piper is in love with her play kitchen from her birthday (she plays with it every, single, day.) And what's a tiny kitchen without a tiny chef?
Felt and wood food- did I mention she likes to cook? She's been making us multiple "sammitches" a day. So far my favorite combination might be bacon, pickles and grape jelly.
Animal alphabet puzzle- She's an animal lover through and through (as long as they're just in puzzle form, not live...)
Stickers, books, and playdoh packs- because you seriously, can never, ever, have too many.
Fin was a little hard to buy for, because she doesn't need much, but then so easy because she's delighted by pretty much anything you show her. Here are a few of her favorite things:
Stuffed bunny- My itty-bitty, teeny-tiny, precious little baby is sleeping in her crib now, so she needs a big kid friend to keep her company. She loves how soft he is. But mostly she likes to eat his ears. (And she's pretty annoyed I removed the tags. They were obviously the best part.)
Grocery bag toys- Now that sounds a little homeless, but it's actual the cutest little set of grocery themed teethers and rattles. It all comes in a fun bag that sings songs (which Piper loves). Fin is just happy she can jam the "veggies" in her mouth.
Busy toy- it spins, and lights up, and is all around fun to drop on the ground for your mom to pick up over and over and over again. At least that's how she seems to see it.
Pop up toy- you had one of these- 5 little doors that pop open when you turn a knob, slide as lever, press a button.... But poor Fin has never played with this one for longer than five minutes, because anyone from 1 to 5 seems to think it's the coolest thing they've ever seen. We actually have to set a timer to get Piper to take turns. That's a pretty good toy.
Books- because you can never have too many books. Even when you're a baby.
So they had a pretty good Christmas. But I think maybe I got the best gifts of all:
Cheesy, yeah. But seriously, with a couple squooshy-faced clowns like these, what else do I need?
I’m Courtney- a loud-talking, big-dreaming kind of a girl with a creative streak I can't turn off, a wholly imperfect love for Jesus, and an overwhelming passion for authenticity. I'm superpumped you're here.
