I want to remember: July 4th Edition

Fourth of July is one of my absolute favorite holidays- mostly for purely superficial and indulgent reasons (so much delicious food, fun outdoor activities, great music, and themed fanfare!), though I can get into the meaningful side of patriotism as well. (Show me a reunion between a soldier and his kids...I will bawl).

Having little ones makes the holiday even more fun in so many ways, but also even more of a hassle in so many ways (on Fourth of July, as in life). I've come to terms that these little-kid years might not be prime for firework watching (I'm pretty sure we haven't gone since Piper was born...) but I'm learning to appreciate the special little joys that come with this season as well.

These days, I don't really blog the way I used to...meaning, I don't blog very often, but also, relatedly, I don't blog they same way I used to. I try to carve out time for big posts that are burning on my heart (or seem like they could potentially be helpful to others) but I don't typically make it a priority to do smaller, more routine documentation. Partly that's because I don't have the time anymore (much to my chagrin, raising three kids trumps documenting the raising of three kids) but also partly because we now have a lot more tools in place for recording memories (Instagram posts and stories, Chatbooks, my Five-Year-Journal, 1 Second Every Day, 100 day challenges...) so long-form blogging feels a little antiquated. And actually, typing out that list of all the ways I'm documenting things makes me feel much better about how I'm doing as the "family historian" (which is often about as glamorous as the "family secretary" a role in which I also serve.)

Since I do so much "micro-blogging", posting and saving little snippets, it's harder for me to also commit to a more thorough write up of things that I perceive as more "mundane". But as much as I love looking back on the big stuff- vacations, milestones, birthdays etc.- I don't want to miss the tiny magic that happens in the day to day (even when that day is a holiday). I don't want to remember the forest, but forget the trees. (or perhaps a more accurate metaphor: forget the way that sweet little ladybug felt on my toes as I stood at the base of the trees.) Childhood is a long season, but it's also a million micro-moments that are easy to lose sight of in the present. We don't always make much of these little markers, maybe because we're so tired, maybe because we assume there are a million more coming just like them, maybe because they don't seem special until they're gone.

So as I went to bed last night looking back on all of the events of the day, I replayed little snippets and quotes in my mind. Nothing earth-shattering...just the sweet stuff of who my kids are right now that I want to hold on to.

I want to remember:

• Miller's free and sincere (and sometimes inaccurate) compliments: "Mama, these are great Lunchables that you made."
• The way they eagerly collected every, single flyer the parade participants had to offer, only to hand them over to me immediately without a second glance. Desperately wanted it; cannot be bothered with it. 
• How they found every "act" of the parade equally impressive- LOOK! A dog!/police car!/drummer!/old lady wearing a hat! What is he?...oooh a basement repair guy? Cool!
• Fin practicing handstands with me, reassuring me that she has trouble getting that second leg up too. Watching and taking turns, encouraging me, "That was a good one mama!"
• How excited they were for all the "gear". They wanted to wear all of the necklaces (except the "itchy" flower leis), they fought over the visors, tried to make the headbands fit over their bike helmets, and wanted confirmation that the glasses made them look "supa-cool". (They, in fact, did.)

• The toddler belief that spray bottles are good for misting yourself, each other, your mom, but mostly yourself, and specifically in your mouth. 
• Miller's snow cone flavor request: "I want blue. (long pause)...And red, and orange and green and purple."
• How fast a 32oz Coke Slushie goes when three baby birds think you brought it back to the nest for them.

• The noise their feet make on the hardwood floors (so loud, so fast!) as they run around with their friends playing a made-up game I'll likely never understand.
• That they are still young enough to buy my selfish lies about how the fireworks might be cancelled due to the rain (and rescheduled for when you're like, 8 and won't be such a nightmare if I let you stay up late). "Mama, when we get home will you look on your phone to see if it's going to rain because I've never seen fireworks before!"
• Miller saying "watch me, Tine!" x100 as he throws a ball almost to the ceiling (just a couple feet shy!) again and again to impress his older friend.
• Pop-its, smoke bombs and sparklers are just scary enough to be a thrill, and just safe enough to be fun. 

P.S. Quick little rundowns of our "4ths" from years gone-by: 2009 and 2008.

-------------------------------------------

Psssst....Want to get all the Bowdenisms news delivered right to your inbox? 

YES PLEASE! Subscribe via email and never miss an -ism. xox.

Orlando Magic: A week in seconds

The last time Dustin and I went on vacation JUST US was when I was pregnant with Miller (is it really "just us" when a fetus is present? Debatable). And that was a 3 day trip to a hotel in Pennsylvania (a fancy-schmancy hotel...but still). Outside of that, our last vacation as a couple was in 2014 (a trip so epically lovely, it's a wonder I'm not still talking about it). So, I'm not complaining...just saying, after 3-4 years without an adults-only get away, we were due.

But we actually didn't have a trip on our radar...We've gotten to take AWESOME trips with our kids over the last few years- with family, visiting friends- and we're slated for another beach trip with my mom's side of the family in a month. So it didn't really occur to me to plan something for Dustin and me. It just felt a little unnecessary...or selfish...or both.

Now, in order to tell this story, I have to make a hard segue from self-centered frivolousness into some serious stuff for a minute... In February of this year, Dustin's step-mom passed away. I haven't shared much about it publicly, but we are broken-hearted to have lost her so soon, and equally broken-hearted to witness the pain Dustin's dad is going through. Most of it doesn't feel like my story to share, so I will just say that she was so very VERY loved, by us, our family, and so many others, and she is, and will be, dearly missed.

So now I have to pivot back to vacation, which, again, feels insensitive and clunky...but it's the true context, so here we are. Shortly after she passed, Dustin's dad told him that he had one week remaining at a timeshare and it was expiring in April. He wasn't ready to travel, but didn't want it to go to waste, so he offered it to us. We hemmed and hawed over the whole thing for weeks, but in the end decided it would be a good thing for us to do. And after looking into the (nearly endless) options for destinations, we settled on Florida's Friendliest Hometown: The Villages, Florida.

It's been Dustin's parent's home for the last decade, and a favorite spot of ours. I could go on and on about how much I love it there (if I wasn't already ready to retire, that place would convince me in a heartbeat). We have made such great memories there over the years, so it felt like the perfect choice to spend the first half of our trip with Dustin's dad. We took care of a little bit of family business, but mostly spend the time talking, reminiscing, and just being together...in the sadness, and the joy and the love. For the second half of our trip, we drove up to Orlando and enjoyed a few poolside days a deux. I did almost no planning, no stressing, and it was all wildly better than the humble expectations I put on the trip. Just the chance to be together for a bit, with nothing more to worry about than what chain restaurant booth to choose each night was a gift. (Truly...a gift from his dad, of course, but also a huge gift from my mom who was holding down the fort with all of our kiddos).

I of course adore my kids, and I'd be lying if I said we didn't talk about them at least 85% of the trip (seriously...you can't be in that close proximity to Disney and not have your toddlers on your mind). But oh- the sweet freedom of doing ANYTHING I WANTED...FOR DAYS ON END was bliss I didn't fully remember existed. We did wild things like eat an entire bag of skittles ourselves (no sharesies!), and fall asleep next to an open body of water, and read books that had no pictures, no rhymes, and no mentions of poop. It was terribly unfamiliar, and intoxicatingly awesome. I woke up each day at an hour my cell phone alarm has never heard of, showered without interruption, and forgot the password to my laptop. The weather was perfection, the itinerary was delightfully open, and my travel companion is my absolute favorite.

I always know how lucky I am...but sometimes it's extra awesome to feel it so intensely at once. Oh- and I don't hate having a tan to show for it. So here's a goofy little video of a couple of nerds who don't get out much, having just the best time. 55 (and older), we're comin' for ya (and I'm bringing my shuffle board cue).

P.s. The app I use is called 1 Second Everyday and yes, I am obsessed. You can see more of our video posts, our last vacation in seconds, all of our 1 second every day videos.

--------------------------------------------

Psssst....Want to get all the Bowdenisms news delivered right to your inbox? 

YES PLEASE! Subscribe via email and never miss an -ism.  xox.

The 100 Day Project: #the100dayofdays

Happy Spring (even if it doesn't feel like it)! And Happy (late) Easter! And Happy Monday!
Tomorrow is a big day...and not just because it might reach a temperature above 50 degreese (seriously?!! with teh April snow showers? I can't take it anymore!) It's the start of The 100 Day Project!

If you're not familiar, The 100 Day Project is a creative challenge where you do/make something...anything...every day for 100 days in a row (and then share about it on Instagram, obviously). It's become wildly popular, with artists, writers, and creators of all kinds joining in each year (check out #the100dayproject to see- or follow- all the fun).

Last year I participated for the first time- my "theme" was #100daysofshowyourreal (just sharing something real from my life every day- through words and pictures). And I fell in love with the project. It pushed me to create more, reflect more, share more...I felt inspired, and stretched, and loved the sense of community that formed as others were willing to get vulnerable along the way too. At the end of 100 days I had a collection of thoughts and memories (which I made into a book), so it was not only a fun exercise while I was in it, but it lead me to create a meaningful record of my work, and my heart.

So when the project came around this year, I knew I wanted to do it again- I just had to figure out my idea. I only had a few stipulations...Whatever I landed on needed to be:

• Easy- 100 days of anything is lofty, and I didn't want to get burned out just because I set the my expectations or perimeters too high. I'm an eternal "bite off more than I can chew" kind of girl, so with things like this I'm working on setting reaaaaaaally reasonable goals for myself, so that I can be pleasantly surprised when I exceed them rather than constantly frustrated that things are more overwhelming than I thought.
• Meaningful- without passion and a purpose behind it, I know I won't be able to stick with the project. Feeling like the output matters- for any reason, and even just to me- is key in helping me push through the creative block or struggles with keeping up. Yes, there is absolute value in doing for doing's sake, so I don't want to get caught up in making every single day a masterpiece, but at the same time, if I'm going to devote this much time and effort to something, I want to feel like it there's a larger point to it all in the end. Doesn't have to be life-changing...just something tangible to look back on with pride and gratitude.
• Portable- the time period overlaps with a couple vacations, and work trips etc. so it has to be something I can do on the go. This is helpful even on "regular" days too, because it means I can get it done anywhere, vs. having to carve out dedicated space/time to do it.
• Fun- or why do it, right?

What I loved about my Show Your Real project is it was basically a journal, with a loose theme; enough structure to give me a purpose, but enough leeway to not feel too confined with my ideas. The fact that it was just photos and captions meant I could do it anywhere and anytime. And while it didn't really push me to pick up a new skill (like drawing or hand-lettering etc.) it did encourage me to express myself more often, and devote more attention to hobbies- photography and writing- that I really enjoy.

Since it worked out before, I more or less just wanted to repeat my approach from last year, with a new "creative hook". And after a week or two of mulling it over, I found my inspiration- Days! (it was right there in the title all along!) But specifically- I'm thinking of those crazy "official" daily holidays that someone somewhere made up, and the whole internet just goes along with. You know what I'm talking about: National Kitten Day, Craft Beer Day, Hug a Newsperson day (joke..but it's real, and it's coming up). I'll use those days as a starting point (I downloaded an app so I can keep an eye on the upcoming days)...but from there it's pretty free-form. Sometimes I'll participate in the actual holiday (anything with a food theme, probably), but more often I plan to use it as a jumping off point for musings...a writing prompt and inspiration to share some related memories, viewpoints, or ideas. Many of these days are pretty silly, so I'm excited to embrace some of that, and just lean into the cheesy simple pleasures of it all. We can all use a few more reasons to celebrate, right? How 'bout 100 more reasons? But at the same time, I'm hoping to also take it a little deeper than just executing 100 random tasks. I want it to be more about reflection than endless action, so I think it'll be a good stretch for me to focus on a different topic every day, and see what thoughts and emotions it stirs up.

The official challenge starts next week, but today’s “holiday” is too much fun to resist. So based on today’s actual events, here are my (official/unofficial) contenders for Make Up Your Own Holiday Day: *Supper Club Day (/Eat Spam for Dinner Day) * Work From Home Day (/Good Hairday Gone to Waste Day) * Throwback Craft Day (/Tile Your Kitchen Floor with Melted Beads Day) * Shameless Outfit Repeating Day (see also: tomorrow) * First Day of Spring Break (/TV as a Babysitter Day) * Bring Back a Catchphrase Day (/“That’s a No For Me Dawg” Day) * Take a Risk Day (/Bargain Meat Expiration Day) * Carpal Tunnel Awareness Day (/Lengthy Instagram Caption Day) ... See you in a few days! #the100daysofdays #the100dayproject #makeupyourownholidayday

A post shared by Courtney Bowden (@the100daysofdays) on Mar 26, 2018 at 8:33pm PDT

So...that's the plan. Plan-ish. Loosey-goosey. Feels good.

I'll be posting on @the100daysofdays using the hashtag #the100daysofdays. I'd be delighted if you'd follow along. And please let me know if you join in the project as well...I love following other folks' creative endevors!

--------------------------------------------

Psssst....Want to get all the Bowdenisms news delivered right to your inbox? 

YES PLEASE! Subscribe via email and never miss an -ism.  xox.

Thanks Thanks Thanks

Oh how I LOOOOOOOOVE Thanksgiving. Seriously...it's in my top five favorite holidays. Maybe even top three. But really, what's not to love? It's like the trifle/shepherd's pie of holidays:

Food: good

Family: good

Four day weekend: good

Yep. It's a winner. Plus...pause while I bring you brand new information...it's all about being thankful. Another very good thing. 

I could go on (and on and on and on) about the big big blessings in my life- my job, my house, my family, my church, my friends...I could get really deep and sappy, and theological, and heavy (oh wait...I sort of already did that) and it would be real and true and good....But you know what else is real and true and good? Silly, frivolous fun. Yes...let's add a layer of that to our trifle! So here's a silly little list of some somewhat frivolous things that in this moment I'm really, truly thankful for (And please feel free to ignore that approximately 85% of this list is food):

• Magic keys that unlock my van doors from inside my purse
• Sunflower crunch chopped salad
• Baby clothes with animal shaped feet
• Beer
• iphone chargers with extra long cords
• That noise that babies make before they go to sleep, where they breath in like four times in a row and then relax. You know that noise? Yes. 
• Selfie sticks (Judge me all you want. They're fun). 

• Oxy clean
• When my kids requests "puffs" (two pigtail buns) in their hair
• A house with more than one bathroom (especially when the whole family has the stomach flu. Ok, that was complaining disguised as gratitude...)
• Chick Fil A sauce. And Cane's sauce. And Bibibop's yum yum sauce. I love sauce. Sauce sauce sauce.
• Puffins. I'm just really happy to live in a world where we have animals that look like puffins, that are named something like puffins. 
• Having Dustin chauffeur me to work
• Matching Christmas jammies (I'm putting that one out there early. If I'm thankful for them, they will come). 
• My diaper bag/work bag/makes me feel stylish and put together while hiding smooshed up fruit snacks and backup onesies bag. 

• Crockpot meals
• Getting a surprise bonus third peanut inside of one shell (as if Five Guys could get any better!)
• Baby sneezes
• When Miller wakes up at 4AM (not 2, not 6). It's late enough that I actually got a fair number of hours in a row, and early enough to still have time to go back to bed. 
• The 100 Grand bars I sneaked out of my kids' Halloween buckets
• The way Fin pronounces "pan-pakes"
• First floor laundry (I actually love hearing the washer/dryer running. Makes me feel like I'm being productive, just by proximity).
• Muppets
• This song
• The tears of joy emoji. (and wide-eyed emoji. and Oprah praise hands emoji.)
• Blanket cardigans 

And about 1,000 (x 1,000) other things, epically big and impossibly small. Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! Muah!

----------------------------------

I'm thrilled to be partnering with Lily Jade...I really do love my bag so much I could make an entire list just about it: converts to a backpack, made of yummy (and durable, and wipeable) leather, big enough to store all my stuff without making me feel like I'm lugging a rolly-suitcase, outside pockets for all the things I have to have constant/immediate access to (keys, phone, so many stray hairclips and tiny rings). And when I take it to work I can forget for a few minutes that I'm a mom. Until I realize there's spit up on my shirt...{Madeline diaper bag care of Lily Jade. All thoughts- and thanks-are my own}

----------------------------------

P.s. You can check out a couple thankful-lists from the past...(You're going to want to click on that link, if only to enjoy Fin's fat thighs. NOM NOM!)

-------------------------------------

Psssst....Want to get all the Bowdenisms news delivered right to your inbox? 
YES PLEASE! Subscribe via email and never miss an -ism.  xox.

TGIF

Who's ready for the most original blog post idea ever?

(I hope there are no hands in the air, and we can all move along with what I have planned for today...)

It's been a long week (says me, every Thursday night...) but rather than dwell on the not-so-fun of it all, I thought I'd make a list of all the little lovelies I've been noticing recently (or should noticed, but can at least recognize in hindsight). So- in no particular order, here are some very awesome things about our right now-ish:

• The delightful weather. And yes, I call 40's and foggy delightful, because anything is better than the 60 straight days of sub zero temps we just emerged from. Low standards are a silver lining!
• Our new towel hook, shaped like a mermaid. 
• Showing up in matching Johnny Cash outfits to church with my mom: 

• "Reading" the bible every night, and answering questions like, "Why the snake not listening?" "What's obey?"
• House of Cards Season 3. And the Serial Podcast. And Mad Men Season 2.
• Crazy hair: 

• A new cleaning lady. Yes, I spent the entire evening before making everyone (mostly me) clean up for the cleaner, but still...worth it. 
• The "outfit" Piper picked out for me: 

• Cinnamon swirl pancakes "sandwiches" with cream cheese filling
• Team (Kinda, but really mostly by default) Whitney: 

• Little girls in big raincoats (you gotta just trust me, without a visual)
• When it's still light outside at 7:30
• Actually taking a picture with my real live camera for a change:

(Their TGIF list includes Breakfast Picnics, Wild Kratts and Stealing Your Sister's Bacon when She's Watching Wild Kratts)

I could probably go on...and on...Funny how many blessings you have when you actually sit down to count them...TGIF indeed.

-------------------------------------

Psssst....Want to get all the Bowdenisms news delivered right to your inbox? 
YES PLEASE! Subscribe via email and never miss an -ism.  xox. 

So Much Yes

I posted a photo to instagram the other day using the caption "so much yes in this photo"...

So much YES in this photo. #thebowdensisters

A photo posted by Courtney Bowden (@bowdenisms) on Dec 12, 2014 at 4:35pm PST

...I was just loving everything captured in that moment and didn't have words to sum it up better than YES.
But now looking back on our Christmas as a whole (not that it's over...please say it's not over!) and I'm feeling like "so much yes" is truly the motto for our entire holiday.

Matching jammies? Yes.
Candy before and after dinner? Yes.
Crazy late bedtime to make time for a special book and scattering of "reindeer food" on the lawn? Oh, YES.

Christmas is Yes. Yes to all of it, and then some more on top of that. More friends, more family. More treats. More books. More naps. More drinks. Even more drinks. More snuggles. More love More Jesus.

In general I am a more is more person, striving to come from "a place of yes" whenever I can. I was explaining my love (and collection) of ampersands to someone last week, and I said that basically I love the concept of AND. It's a principle of improv comedy, that you're always supposed to support your partner, going along with their idea, building on it with "yes, and". And while I'm not an improv comedian, I love that idea. Support each other...allow their dreams...build together...say YES when you can (which is probably a lot more often than I even think). It's worth noting perhaps, that I'm not an advocate of spoiled kids, drowning in presents, lacking any sense of boundaries or limits. But if there was ever a time to blur the edges of routine and rules in the name of memory making magic, then Christmas is it.

So much of toddlerhood is filled with NO. Many from me: "No you may not do that, or that, or that, or have that, or take that, or say that, or yell that..." And also so many from them- "No, no, nyee-OH, NO" all the live-long day. And there was still SO MUCH NO this holiday weekend, because even the powers of Santa and Baby Jesus combined can't overcome the will of our two little blonde furies (nor can they make up entirely for my occasional impatience and frustration despite my best efforts) But in spite of all the moments where I should have done better, or I wished they behaved better, our holiday was still marked with so much good, so much magic nestled in the ordinary, so much beauty of this incredible life we're given one little wild moment at a time. And as I look back on the last few days as a family, I'm so thankful for the yeses. Some were audible: "Please mama, can we?" "Yes!" And some were silent: Can you believe how lucky were are? How cute they are? How awesome this is? No, not at all...but also yessssssssss.

Here are a few snapshots from our pile of yes:

 Santa came!! YESSSSS

Tiny hands, tiny presents:

Temporary tattoos on chubby forearms. Zebras wearing Santa hats. The way babies squat to do everything. These are a few of my unexpected favorite things. 

Using new play-doh toys to "help" make cinnamon rolls

Cream cheese frosting is always yes

The neighbors are throwing away their old playhouse, would you like it? uh, Yes!

Let's plop the kids on the kitchen table so I can take 1,000 pictures...Yes?

 No words. Just yes.

Wearing her new mittens + stealing her sister's new toy (met with the opposite of yes: "NO! That's my favorite new toy I got for my birf-day from Santa. I very like it. You cannot have it, FIN-NY!")

Zoning out hard while watching Frosty the Snowman Returns.

So we had a yes kind of Christmas, and I'm so very hopeful we can keep seeing all the beauty of this yes kind of life...

Merry Christmas!

  -------------------------------------

Psssst....Want to get all the Bowdenisms news delivered right to your inbox? 
YES PLEASE! Subscribe via email and never miss an -ism.  xox. 

Pizza shop photoshoot

On Sunday, we trekked out to get a tree, but stopped for a quick (kind of...) slice of pizza- or 8- on the way. (Full bellies = happy hunters) We goofed around for a bit while we waited on our food, and I handed the camera to Dustin to snap a few shots of my rowdy booth-mates.

And this magic happened:

Dang, I love that little girl. And I'm downright obsessed with how Dustin captured her in this photo. (Though I'm not in love with how she looks about a day away from her teenage years...How is this happening?!)

Oh- and then there's this hamball:

Sometimes (a lot) in my head I call her Crazy Old Maurice.

I'm so thankful for these goons. And for sunshine-y December days, last minute plan changes, toddlers who eat their weight in pizza crust, and for those magic moments when the mundane things of life turn unexpectedly awesome. Our family lives at this wild intersection of routine and spectacular, and I have to say: it's a crazy-good spot to be.

Little signs of small life

   Even when they're not around, there are little signs of my babies everywhere. They've changed my life...(and my purse, and my fridge, and my bathroom, and my pockets...) I may not always like being covered in stickers, but there's something funny about finding a jingly owl in your bed in the middle of the night. Love the little trails and calling cards my littles leave.