On the Record: Tools for Documenting 2020

Literally nobody: 

 

Me: OMG I can't believe it's already 2020...that's practically the future. I have so many feels, and thoughts, and plans, and dreams, LET ME BLOG ABOUT IT!!

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Ok. Let's be honest- the blog has been getting a bit dusty recently (the last 3 years is recent, right? Well, considering I still think of myself as a "recent" college grad -against all evidence to the contrary- we'll go with yes.) And though a new year (and new decade!!) should be the perfect Venn Diagram of nostalgia and possibility to get my creative juices flowing...it's just....not gonna happen. Don't get me wrong- I'm not above the New Year's hype. In the next few days, I'm nearly guaranteed to get overcome by the (warp speed) passage of time and weep quietly into my sparkling pear cider over the misty water-colored memmmmmoriiiiies of it all. I'm also most certainly going to get caught up in the resolution pressure and come up with elaborate New Year, New Me schemes (that I will unceremoniously abandon in the matter of weeks). But in this moment, I don't have the capacity (mental or logistical) to wax nostalgically about the '10's (or anything really). It's honestly all I can do to keep up with the pace of now, I struggle to look too far back or forward. 

BUT- I DO love documenting and memory keeping- and have found a few projects and tools over the years that I'm planning to bring into 2020. Thought I'd share these favs here!

If you want to....

Be a Movie Star:

I'm about to wrap our fourth year of capturing little snippets via One Second Every Day and it remains just one of my very favorite things. I love that it encourages me to record more footage of our lives...it makes me notice and appreciate the regular everyday moments (and micro-moments) that add up to a whole life. You can see our compilations: #bowdens1se and download the app to start your own. 

If you want to....

Rekindle Your Love for Dear Old Diary: 

Always wanted to journal, but never seem to find the time (or motivation)? I feel you. But the One Line a Day journal makes it about as easy as it's ever going to get. It's a five-year journal with one page per day of the year. Each page has room for a few sentences from that day, which in my experience is just enough to record some meaningful memories (or even just mundane happenings) without getting overwhelmed by the task of keeping up. Sure, I am usually at least a week or two behind, but I managed to fill up my last volume with relatively few gaps (unless you count the 4 year hiatus I took from 2010 to 2015). And the payoff is so fun when you're able to look back on "your day in history" (I always describe it as "analog Timehop") and marvel at how far you've come (or how some things never change). 

If you want to....

Print Some Real Live Pictures on Real Live Paper:

Chat books, ya'll. This subscription service has been a total game-changer for me. I have it connected to my Instagram (but it works with any social channel, or just your phone's camera roll), so it automatically funnels all my pics (and wordy, wordy captions!) into a book...when it reaches 60 pages- boom! Prints and ships. I'm on my 35th volume (I started in June of 2013- back when we were welcoming baby Finney!) and they are the only family photo albums I have. I've got BIG dreams of making 2020 the year I finally get my act together and make family "yearbook" photo albums (I only have 14 years of married life to catch up on...) but regardless of if I ever dig myself out of that mom-guilt hole (and digital file mountains), I'm endlessly thankful for how easy Chatbooks makes it to (literally) hold on to our memories. (If you're new to the game you can save $10 on your first order.)

 

If you want to....

Listen to Something Besides The Frozen 2 Soundtrack: 

(Ok- this one isn't about documenting memories...but it is about making memories, and it's a fun project to kick off a new year!)

In a music rut? Solution: The Magical Musical Mystery Tour. "The what now?" you ask? (Well I've only been sharing it every week on my Instagram stories for a year...but I'll forgive you if you missed it, just as you'll forgive me for talking about it again). In an effort to expand our family's musical repertoire, we introduced a year-long project to listen to different artists each week. And it was WILDLY SUCCESSFUL. By that I mean-my van jams were mercifully light on the Kidz Bop, and my kids actually might know a thing or two about musicians beyond Taylor Swift. (not hating, Tay Tay!) I've got a new version in the works for 2020 (aiming to start mid-January) but in the meantime, you can rock the original version:

• Print out the the list of artists
• Put them in a jar, and pull out one each week. 
• Rock out!

You can also check out the playlist with all our pre-filtered picks.

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I know I get a little over the top sometimes with documenting alllll the things (I hear you, Dustin! I'm not changing, but I hear you!) but these apps and tools help me capture things without getting (too) stressed. If you give any of these a shot- let me know! I'd love to follow along!

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Mom-life Podcast

Last week I was a guest on Jen Hatzung's show: The Mom Life Podcast. I met Jen years ago, at my first blogging conference, and have kept up with her various projects since then. She started a mom-centered podcast earlier this year, talking with "moms who are leaning into finding their direction" and after checking out the first few episodes, I knew I wanted to get in on the fun!

I've done a podcast before, but just once, a few years ago, so I'm hardly a pro. But Jen is so easy to talk to, I kind of forgot wasn't just a chat with a friend. (Well, it was a chat with a friend. A chat that was recorded and then published on the internet).

To prep, Jen sent over some prompts to get me thinking...It was so helpful to start get my thoughts down on paper before we talked, and it was interesting to see how much my perspective has changed over the years. Sometimes (most times) I can't believe I've been a mom for over five years...or that I have three kids. I still vividly remember the early days with just one, where I felt like I seriously might not make it. There's no way I could have imagined the life I have now, or felt like I'd actually have wisdom to share with others! Now of course, I don't have all (or many), (or any?) of the answers to motherhood's mysteries and challenges, but I loved being able to look back on my experience thus far, and feel like the things I've learned along the way could help encourage someone else. I'll never feel like "I've made it" as a mom...but this was a little bit of validation that I'm come a long way as a mom, and a reminder that I can be used in big and small ways even while I'm still a work in progress.

A little peek into our chat: 

Differences between early motherhood and today:

Early motherhood was SO STINKING HARD. The first time around, my world was rocked, physically and emotionally, and there were about 8 weeks where I muddled through everything on a roller coaster of "this is the best thing that's every happened to me!" and "why do I feel so inadequate/broken and why can't I stop crying?"

AND THEN? I had another kid...which I thought was going to be SO easy (I mean...we're already doing all the things...how hard could it be to do it x2?) I was SO wrong. Going from 1 to 2 kids for me was like going from 1 to 100. I was outnumbered and exhausted, (and always sweaty! Summer baby and no A/C in our house? Mistake.)

Both times I eventually found my groove. But with kid number 3 it was BLISSFULLY different. I don't know if it was actually easier...I think it was a combo of a good baby, lower expectations, and a little bit of experience on my side. This time I knew it was going to be hard, and I braced myself differently. So I still had hard days (/minutes/hours/weeks) but it doesn't feel all consuming or hopeless like it had with the others.

Any of my "success" now, I attribute to revisions to (and lowering of) my expectations. When all three of them are wailing at the same time, I'm better able to let it ride, because OF COURSE they're all crying. What do you expect with 3 small kids? Things are a mess (figuratively and literally) with us a lot of the time, but I'm much more ok with that. I have less to prove, and my pride has been eroded over time. (in a good way...mostly...I think...) I figure a family of five, with two full-time-working parents is going to run somewhat on a wing and a prayer. So we are winging it and praying a whole lot of the time.

Your biggest motherhood challenge these days:

I struggle with the juggling act that our life currently requires. My husband and I are constantly switching off; he travels, I travel, he watches them while I go out, I cover so he can volunteer. Et cetera, et cetera, infinity. It seems like we're always handing off and coordinating. It gets exhausting to feel like everything has to be orchestrated so precisely...I miss spontaneity, and the ability to do things together (without figuring out a babysitter!)

What you would tell your new mama self about motherhood:

Oh girl. You are going to be bad at this.

I am hard-wired with a need for achievement and significance. So I've spent my whole life chasing both. Motherhood is nearly impossible to feel accomplished at, so it's been a struggle for me...to struggle. I still feel like I'm doing everything wrong at times, but I'm less surprised or rattled by my incompetence. It's been huge for me to not only learn how to mother, but to learn how to do something that will never be finished.

You can listen to my episode here, and if you get hooked- you can check out the whole show.
And if you can't get enough of audio-Courtney, feel free to listen to my episode of the Sarah R. Bagley Podcast, (or read my recap notes from that show).

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Bloom

Well, it's been quiet around here lately. But don't get confused...by "here" I just mean this blog, not our actual lives. No, life isn't quiet at all. In fact, I'm not sure I could find a word to less accurately describe our lives right now. Maybe orderly. Or relaxing. Or anything in the thesaurus next to calm.

Don't worry- I'm not going to go on a rant about how busy we are, it's just that life right now is pretty hectic, pretty loud, and pretty full. It's all very good stuff (well...it's a lot of very good stuff, with some tantrums, messes and exhaustion layered on top) but it's not been very compatible with blogging. I love creating, and I still have the urge to spend time in this space, but lately it's been all I can do just to keep up with regular life, let alone the documentation traditions I've started (most notably: monthly updates for Miller, and periodic quips from the girls). Then there's my commitment to Thrive Moms, plus my one second everyday project. So there is still some creative expression and memory keeping happening, but there hasn't been quite as much time or space for "written processing" as I'd like.

It's easy for me to get down on myself, frustrated that I'm not being more productive, or better at prioritizing time to for creative pursuits. I mean, I seem to find plenty of time for Netflix binging so I can't really use a "too busy" excuse in good conscience. But at the same time, it's also fair to say that while I've been neglecting the writing recently, I actually have been focusing on the doing (and even more important: the being.) I've talked about this before- the struggle with feeling that I have to choose between making the memories or recording them. Our kids are so small, and so active, and seem to change by the minute. Sometimes that makes me feel manic, striving to document every second before it slips by. But sometimes I'm better at settling in, and soaking it up, taking opportunities to just be with my people, and rely on my memory to preserve the moment. 

Beyond just the documenting though, I miss creating...I'm sad about all the writing, photography, crafting and quilting I'm not doing. Creative expression brings me so much fulfillment, so it's hard to be content when that area is lacking. There's no shortage of busyness, it's a lot of busy-work, that doesn't come with the same sense of pride and satisfaction that makership does. (that's not technically a word. But I think it should be. So I made it. It's what we makers do.) I'm doing a lot these days, but still I look back and feel frustrated that I don't have more to show for it all. 

But I came across a quote recently that seemed to speak right to me, right where I am; So much so that I've been repeating it to myself ever since:  

Be patient with yourself. Nothing in nature blooms all year. 

OH, how I long to always be in bloom. Who doesn't?! I want to be full of color, a thing of beauty. I want to be open and lovely, basking in the sun, feeling proud to be on display.

But that's just not realistic. Nothing in nature blooms all year. Before the flowers, there must be buds. Stems. Leaves. Roots. And of course, even once the flowers come, they aren't forever.  Between blooms, there is withering, and dormancy, and rest.

And as a gardener (a topic I'm only qualified to speak about metaphorically), there are times to water, and times to prune. Times to fertilize, and times...to wait.

So while I long to be always blooming- to feel the constant joy of creation, celebration, and big, showy radiance- I know that life isn't contained to that season alone. Even perennials- known for their brilliant blooming- go through cycles of change. There are seasons of budding and growth; and of wilting and hardening off.

I may be frustrated that I'm not blooming in exactly the way I'd like to be right now, but if I'm patient with myself I realize that I'm still in a rich- and necessary- season. We're becoming rooted: getting entrenched with family, establishing deep connections with friends and spreading wide, complex relationship pathways. We're growing: working on a solid marriage- the trunk to our family tree, adding branches of children and nurturing their growth. We're pruning: cutting out the things that are too much to sustain, and threaten to take away from what matters most. We're drinking in the nourishment that God is providing, we're preparing protection for storms, and we're fanning our leaves out to soak up as much sunlight as we possibly can.

So right now, I'm not in bloom every day. I'm not show-ready all the time. My energy isn't being funneled into beautiful petals made for admiration. But that doesn't mean this season isn't worthwhile, and good, and full. I need to be patient with myself, and settle into all that right now holds for me, knowing the blooming will come again, soon enough.

P.s. More about "seasons" of motherhood, and the doing/being balance.

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New look, new (to me) sounds

You see that there header? Awww yeaaah.

I was feeling the urge to mix it up around here a little bit. Nothing against graph paper (for real, how can you hate on tiny little orderly boxes?) but I had that theme for the last few years so it was time for a little refresh. So for the past few nights I've stayed up entirely too late wrestling with some HTML to get a few simple buttons looking "Not Janky" (that's a super technical web designer term, obvs). It's definitely not perfect, but hey, we don't do perfect around here. (we do do #showyourreal plugs, apparently) I like to think that I have at least decent design sensibility, but then at the same time I also know I'm a more plus more plus more plus stripes plus sparkles!! kind of person. So I tried to rein that in as much as possible, so no sparkles, but obviously I had to include the stripes at least.

Anyway, it seemed kind of anti-climatic to roll out a fancy new blog outfit, and not have any new content, so I thought while you click around here a little bit (maybe grab a button for your site while you're at it?) I'd give you some tunes to listen to.

I will never brag about either my taste in songs, or my ability to spot the next big musical thing...or really even my awareness of the fact that most things I think are new have actually been around for decades. But hey, I like what I like! And what I like, at least today, are hip-hop covers turned acoustic, retro booty dancing and anything where Dolly Parton prances around in black-and-white. So that's what you're getting.

The guy kills me. Every time.

How bad do you want to go to Dollywood right now? Scratch that, how bad do you want to go to Dollywood in the 90's right now?

Remember that time I played cello in the fifth grade? I could've been somebody.

ps. more music silliness in the archives. Warning- I really do mean silliness. 

B+ Life: Podcast

Hey there! If you found yourself here from Sarah's site, Welcome! I'm thrilled you stopped by!

And if you're a regular around here (hi, mom!) well then, the big news for today is that I'm being featured on Sarah's site as a part of her podcast series.

I've never done a podcast, but when Sarah asked me if I'd like to talk about myself for roughly a half hour, and then post that on the internet, I was IN.
Alright...j a little bit k. Truly, I was honored that she thought of me, and I love the mission of her blog- stories from a "recovering perfectionist in pursuit of living a B+ life." I can totally relate to her struggles with constant comparisons, and striving, and never wanting to "settle" for anything less than perfect. But I've certainly come a long way in my perfectionist journey (think a perfectionist would be willing to lead showyourreal?) so it was fun to chat with her about what I've been learning- and all the things I still have no clue about.

Bowdenisms//Sarah R. Bagley Podcast
I'd love it if you would check it out (warning...it's 41 minutes of gabbing...I won't be offended if you grab some laundry to fold while you listen, or save it for your commute). If you don't know me in real life (hi, reader who isn't my mom!) hopefully you'll get a bit of a better sense of who I am, how dramatic (and fast!) I talk, and my perspective on twitter, balance (what?!) and why I can't be bothered to cook for my kids' birthdays.

And if podcasts aren't your thing, I included the highlights here (don't judge me for editing out all of my "likes" and "ums"). And in either case, just for fun, I included some pics to round out the audio track...because everything is better with (slightly blurry, taken with an iphone, but way better than nothing) baby pics. And donuts. Mmmmmmmmmm, donuts.

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Two under Two

"When I say I have two little kids, I mean I have two little kids. It is full time wild around here...It is the best of times and the worst of times in every single moment."

Why did I start a blog? 

"I just really like the sound of my own voice...just kidding. I think in the beginning I had no plan at all....In the beginning it was a little haphazard and ridiculous. And now it's equally ridiculous, but maybe slightly less haphazard."

But really...why? 

"I think I'm a natural story teller. Not maybe not naturally awesome, but it's innate in me to want to do it. When something happens, I want to spin it as a story. If I have your attention in any setting I want to keep your attention, hold your attention. I want to charm you and make you laugh.:

Show Your Real

"If I want people to be vulnerable, or I want people to be honest and be willing to show the parts that we don't always show...if that's what I want, then I need to put that out there, and I need to create that, to help spur it on in other people."

And the lighter side of Show Your Real

 "One of things I also love about Show Your Real is people being willing to stand up and be proud of the things they are good at...Your real can also be that you're in love with this part of your life. Or you're proud of what you've accomplished here. Or you're thankful for this thing...It's saying 'Yeah, my real is so so great. And so bad. And both. At the same time.' "

The wildness of motherhood

"I feel like you have out of body experiences every once in a while, where you're just like 'This is my life. This is happening right now. What is going on?' "

Life Balance 

"Oh the baaaaalance...Yeah, that's not a thing....Balance is not in a day....Did you get all the things done in one day? Were you a great mom, and a great worker, and a great blogger, and a great everything, this one day? Because, no. You weren't. Maybe I was one of those. I hope....It's looking at how it balances out in total....And if it takes til Friday for it to balance out, that's alright. It's just a matter of how big you're willing to make your lens....Sometimes it's going to take more than a week for me to feel like it's balanced."

Seasons of unbalance

 "The first six months of my daughter's life (the second one)...they were hard. I mean, I loved her, and I loved having her, but there were days when my two year old- I was just like, 'Can you just go somewhere else, today?'...It was just too much for me sometimes....I wasn't necessarily expecting balance in that season. Because it wasn't going to happen: We were unbalanced. And that's ok, because that's not an entire life. I don't necessarily strive to live in those valleys I guess, but...Sometimes I have to pep talk myself and say 'You know what? This might not be it for you....You don't have to be perfect on this certain Monday. Or this week or this month. It's about the entire thing. And if you scope it out all the way to a lifetime, everyone is doing ok."

What does B+ mean to me? 

"There was a time, when B+, was like Oh my gosh, no! I was that obnoxious, type A, has to get an A type of person...I love the idea, but there's something about me that still feels super icky about B+. I'm not B+, No, I'm better than that, right? As much as I've go some of the perfectionism, I never let go the striving. I will always be that way. And I don't know that I even want to change that...it's just who I am. it's my passion, it's my drive...B+ is not about doing things to a B+ level..it's doing some things to an A+ super+, and some things? I get an F. And I don't care."

"Don't find what you're bad at and try to fix it, because you're only going to get to a certain level. So why am I making my F into a C? It's still going to be a C, who cares? Just be an F. Move on. Take your B+, take your A- and polish those up and be awesome at it. If that's what matters to you, really go after that. I'm trying to find the pieces of me that I love, or that are natural to me, and do more of those and do those better and pour into those and bless people with those pieces of me."

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Thanks for joining me in this wild adventure that is silliness/motherhood/vulnerability/internet/life.
If you find you haven't had your Bowdenisms fill, please feel free to snoop around a bit, or even better- sign up to follow the action: instagram | facebook | twitter

Bio-logy

I’ve got some super fun stuff in the works in blog land that I (almost) can’t wait to share with you. Except that I can wait…and should…at least a little bit…so I will.
But in the meantime, I’ve been working on updating my bios on my various social media accounts, which let me just say, is harder than one might think. Are you ready for some #bloggerproblems? See, different platforms have different bio requirements, partially related to character count limits. How do I convey my unique essence in 160 characters, I ask you?! I am a snowflake. A one of a kind creation with complex nuances that can’t be contained by numerical limits. 

OR…
...I’m just really wordy. 

Frankly…I struggle to do anything in 160 characters (Inclusive of writing my name…Courtney Stegmayer Bowden typically fills up alllllll the boxes on a scantron. And two lines on my driver's license). I managed to get my life summarized in 100 words. But it was a struggle. 

So I’m working on culling down my entire personality, likes, dislikes, societal roles, and quirks into a little bite sized chunks for the gnat-like attention span of social media. And I’ve found that telling my whole story in such a small format makes it feel trite. Yes, I’m a wife, mom, and marketer. But is that it? But if I just go with the quirky angle, do people know I’m more than just a cheese head? (And I do mean cheese both literally and figuratively. Man, I love that stuff.) How do you hit on all the pillars of my life, and still have room for the spunk? So it was a challenge for a Susie Talks-a-lot like me, but here’s what I landed on…for now:

Instagram: 

wife & mama. worker bee & hustler. 
coke slushie connoisseur & #showyourreal founder.
life enthusiast.

Twitter/Pinterest etc.

A loud talking, big dreamer of a girl, Passionate about family, Jesus, and living an authentic life (oh..and Coke Zero). ‪#showyourreal

(I also updated the New Here? section of the blog itself. You know…if you’re into that sort of thing.)

Woof…How’s that for a peek behind the curtain on what it takes to be a professional (ha!) blogger? What do you think? Did I capture my own essence? Of if you don't know me enough to be sure...did I pique your interest enough to make you want to find out what I'm all about? 

And does anyone else struggle with writing your own bio? Or is succinct-ity your strong suit? (That should totally be a word, no? But I digress…)

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Bonus bio bits: just because I’m a weirdo, I’ll be tweeting my failed bio drafts, and sad runners-up. Join me for some pure silliness (my specialty).

Life lately

I've been out of the swing of things lately when it comes to blogging. And though I've got a bunch of things drafted and in the works, I haven't quite found the energy, motivation, or interest to finish them. I'm thinking I need a nice, easy softball to get my writing muscles warmed up again. So batter up...

Things I've been doing instead of blogging:

• Watching House of Cards- Needed something to fill the void while we wait for season 2 of Orange is the New Black. Loving this series more than I thought I would. But Frank's wife is the worst, right? (We're only about halfway through the first season, so don't spoil anything...) 
• Shopping for bridesmaid dresses- my best friend is getting married! In a month!! Whoo hoo!!!
• Gossiping about the Bachelor- I have too many thoughts to even put it into words. Polarizing, this guy. (Except pretty much everyone is standing on one pole in agreement. Even his mom). 
• Eating in our new dining room- I can't wait to share it with you! Well....I can wait I guess, because I have waited at least a month already, but for real, it looks so good I can't wait to share. 
• Growing my hair out- keeps me busy. 
• Forgetting to pick up books at the library- better than forgetting to return books to the library. 
• Complaining about how cold it is- #polarvortex #snowpocalypse overit
• (Barely) surviving the stomach flu- loose calculations predict we'll only have to endure that 20 more times before we actually die. Bright side!
• Playing candy crush- crushin' it!!!

Oh- and then there's the working, and the baby raising....there's a LOT of that going on. But we're just talking free time here. And if you don't count the time spent with those animals we call children, or cleaning up after those animals, prep/commuting time (pancake making, lunch packing, sock finding) or sleeping hours (which should maybe be counted in minutes anyway), there's not a whole lot of time left on the clock for voluntary pursuits. But we're still managing to pack things in. Even if it's mundane stuff. Our life is full, in the silliest, busiest, best sort of ways. 

So what about you? What have you been doing instead of reading my blog? (Ha!)

Show your real: Cally

Cally is sharing today, and I love that she took the Show Your Real prompt and applied it to her specific area of focus- work, faith and blogging. Cally has such a interesting perspective, examining the intersection of faith and career...an area that is challenging for so many of us- including myself- to navigate. So often, those two things seem isolated- especially for those of us who work in the secular industry- like our work pursuits are somehow separate from what God has planned for us. But there is so much to learn, and so much value when we allow Jesus to lead in our careers, as well as any of our passions. I identify so much with Cally's struggles to feel relevant, focused and appreciated. And I'm excited to have her unique voice here today. 

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Thanks for joining me here today as I “show my real!” My name is Cally, and, as Courtney mentioned, I blog over at Uncompromised Vocation. I’m a young professional and international business graduate student living in Boston, and I’m passionate about social impact. I’m also passionate about people finding their passions and using them for good. These two things together are the underlying foundations for my blog. 

  My “Why I’m Writing” tab says it best: I’m writing for those who have dreams and passions to have a greater impact in the world. I’m writing to encourage other young professionals who are looking to define their passions and turn them into meaningful careers. I’m writing for those in a season of waiting, who are fighting for contentment and direction in their current jobs while figuring out what it is they really want to do.

Your faith and your vocation don’t have to be mutually exclusive. In fact, faith should inform and be the driving force in finding your vocation. I write to encourage people to pursue something with passion and conviction, or as I like to call it, an uncompromised vocation.

I’d describe myself as a passionate person. I’m also constantly searching for inspiration in things all around me - not just for my blog, but for life in general. I love to be inspired. I’ve found, however, that when it comes to blogging, it is both a blessing and a curse. Currently I’m in a season where I’m finding difficulty maintaining consistency with my posts. Some of it comes from self-doubt: not believing that I have a meaningful voice to speak into peoples’ lives about faith and vocation. Not believing that my words or experience carries any weight with the people I’m writing for. But some of it also comes from trying to go in a million different directions all at once. Perhaps you could call it a lack of focus, but it’s more like trying to focus on several things at once.

Blog content. Blog design. Should I redesign? What social issues to I highlight? Do they even have a place? Trying to find direction with my own career. How do I articulate that into my own blog? How deep do I dig into scripture when I share it? Several thoughts are constantly swirling around in my head every time I sit down to write a post. A few months ago, I finished a first draft of a post and realized that I had actually written three different posts all in one. Taking one idea and sticking to it has been a hard process for me to grasp as of late.

Practical steps that have helped me achieve more focused writing have been prayer and journaling. I will take one thought and pray over it, and journal on that thought alone during that allotted time. My prayers become coherent thoughts as He gives me a clear vision. It is a practice that gives me direction and peace. Because, ultimately, I want any and all inspiration to come from the Lord, right? I’ve realized how much I need to do this, personally, because it’s so easy for me to take an idea and run with it before giving it to Jesus first.

This may not be the most profound blog post on blogging you’ve ever read, but this is real. This is my current reality. I appreciate this series so much because it’s the reality of day-to-day, behind the scenes stuff that might not make, as Courtney describes it, the “highlight reel” of typical blogging. Blogging has given me a deeper appreciation for bloggers who consistently deliver quality content because I now know that this kind of stuff doesn’t appear out of thin air! Even writing this post for the Show Your Real series has helped me ponder and realize things about the writing process that didn’t occur to me before. 

I’m still learning, and I’m still growing. This whole blogging thing has been really cathartic for me, as I’m still navigating my own career and passions. And it’s always so reassuring to receive a message from someone who needed to hear exactly what I wrote about in my last post. Encouragement is my love language, and it helps keep me going. But what I need to learn to do more is give myself grace for the moments when I find myself saying I should be writing this or I should be doing that. Because blogging about things we’re passionate about should be a source of joy, not of guilt and duty.

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Show Your Real is a bi-weekly series of guest posts centered around the concept of authenticity. The goal is to encourage each other to expose the reality of our lives- good and bad- and to foster a sense of community that goes beyond the often suface-cy interactions of social media. We invite all of you to participate! Please comment, link, and hashtag to spread the showyourreal love. If you would like to contribute a guest post in this series, please email me! 

Show Your Real: Melissa

When Melissa of Buffy Sunshine found the Show Your Real series, and emailed me saying she wanted to contribute, I was thrilled to hear someone liked what we're building here enough to want to be a part of it!   Melissa is a self-described "art loving, organic-eating hot mess of a pastor's wife." She has four kids who  may just be the cutest little southern hipsters I've ever seen. I'm so happy to have her joining the series today. And if you're a fan like Melissa, send me an email..I'd love to have you share your real!

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Hello! I am thrilled to contribute to all the realness that's happening in this little corner of the blog world. I'm always fascinated to learn that seemingly well put together friends, bloggers, shop owners etc, are real people with frustrations and guilt and unwashed dishes. It helps me. It encourages me. It challenges me.

I have four children, ages 8, 7, 5 and 1. They are full of energy and imagination and they change clothes four or five times a day. We take them on camping trips, feed them organic food, don't let them watch much t.v. and always have a messy art project going on.

On a typical day, I wake up around 7am and read two chapters of the Bible. Sometimes I have time to pray or scribble something in a journal before the kids wake up, but most days they are all in my lap and I am literally holding the Bible above all of their heads so I can soak in the last few words before we start the day. My husband makes me coffee every morning and we all sit down for breakfast together before he leaves for the day. Our mornings are very scheduled... the rest of the day is a tornado of outdoor activities, practices and lessons, laundry, dinner and projects.

After the kids go to bed, I catch up on emails and blogging. I recently started an online magazine called Sunshine Magazine (first issue up September 1, 2013) so I spend a lot of time writing articles, conducting interviews and recruiting advertisers.

In all realness, I am almost always mentally struggling to appear happy and content without seeming "fake." I get lots of emails and blog comments that say, "do you ever have a bad day?" The answer is YES! I have lots of bad moments (and hours and days and weeks). I would rather paint something than wash dishes. I have wrinkles around my eyes and grey hairs. Sometimes I get to Target and notice that one of my kids forgot to wear shoes. I am truly a "real" hot mess of a Pastor's wife with four children who survives each day on large amounts of God's grace and strong coffee.

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Show Your Real is a bi-weekly series of guest posts centered around the concept of authenticity. The goal is to encourage each other to expose the reality of our lives- good and bad- and to foster a sense of community that goes beyond the often suface-cy interactions of social media. We invite all of you to participate! Please comment, link, and hashtag to spread the showyourreal love. If you would like to contribute a guest post in this series, please email me! 

Show Your Real: Casey

I met Casey at The Influence Conference, (which she just so happened to be co-hosting...you know, no big deal) and was struck by how different she was than the typical blogger. She definitely has a strategic side, she's not Internet-famous for nothing! But more than that, she has the most sensitive, deep spirit that longs to share her story while being desperate to hear yours. She finds meaning and significance in things many people (myself included) pass by. I'm inspired by how fully she loves her children and invests in her family. And I'm so grateful she's willing to share in this space today. 

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How does the idea of "Show Your Real" resonate with you..why did you want to participate and share?
It resonates really well with me. I tend to process a lot of raw emotion all the time and writing it and sharing it for me is a really good outlet. Sometimes I am unable to say these same feelings and thoughts out loud but when I sit down to write, they often just pour out :). I think it really helps to show the real. Because we all feel a little less alone to know that others have been there or are there now.

What misconceptions might people have about about your life at first glance?
I think with ANYONE on the internet it is really easy to forget that we are just putting out snippets of our lives... often people think this is the whole picture and that just isn't the case at all. I think it's easy to make assumptions about people on  the internet, it's easy to think that you know someone when really often times just a few pieces of the puzzle. 

What are some of your patterns and routines for a “typical” day?
I am sort of anti.schedule / anti routine! We wake up,  many days hit the park or the pool, eat dinner as a family, play, bath/prayers/bedtimes, then I start working when the kiddos are down!

What does the balance/mix of work/chores/family time/rest/etc look like in your home?
I only work when the kids are asleep and I try to incorporate the kids in chores or household jobs. My husband works from home so if he is fixing something or building something, he has the two older kids out there with him helping every step of the way. Same with me...they love to help with dinner and if we need to cleanup the playroom, we will make a fun game out of it! 

What things have become “your real” now that the you from the past would be surprised about?
I used to love things really really clean. (I mean I still do deep down in my heart) but with three little kids, two dogs, a pet lizard and a pet bunny....I let it go :).

What are the hardest parts of your current season of life? And the best parts?
The hard part for us is that Chris & I are both freelance and so we literally month to month just trust that we will bring in enough jobs & income to cover everything...there are moments that is incredible overwhelming. I experienced faith in a really different and amazing way- having to rely on Him like that month after month. The best parts I would say are just this sweet fun season of raising little ones- we are having the time of our life! 

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Show Your Real is a bi-weekly series of guest posts centered around the concept of authenticity. The goal is to encourage each other to expose the reality of our lives- good and bad- and to foster a sense of community that goes beyond the often suface-cy interactions of social media. We invite all of you to participate! Please comment, link, and hashtag to spread the showyourreal love. If you would like to contribute a guest post in this series, please email me!